Thank you for your continued prayer and support despite my lack of faithfulness in providing updates on my blog. Believe it or not, but we do not have a lot of free time to sit down and crank out a blog post. However, it is very doable, but I have been lacking intentionality. Pardon me if this blog is not very professional or grammatically correct, I plan to just let my mind run!

Revival

Since my last blog, I spent two months living and ministering in Malaysia! We slept on the floor in the room above a church at a strip mall—not the most comfortable, but definitely growing. Our ministry consisted of teaching Rohingya refugee students at a Muslim school and helping the church we stayed at, Bethel Assembly, run nightly services. Additionally, we played futsal at a local sports center every weekend.

The greatest challenge that the Lord presented in this country was the hardness of heart to the true gospel of Jesus Christ. Less than one percent of the Malaysian population professes faith in Christ as their Lord and Savior. Alongside that, many Christians still have traditional religious idols in their practices and households, showing that lines are often blurred and many Christians do not understand that Christ alone is the way, the truth, and the life. Thankfully, we did many house visits (a lot through the means of Christmas caroling) and we got to encourage people in the faith and pray a heart for Jesus over their households. Thanks be to God the Father that He is faithful to change His followers and reconcile them to Him.

Apart from the small Christian population, we lived in an ocean of broken, manmade religion. The three largest religions in Malaysia are Islam, Buddhism, and Hinduism respectively. We talked to these people every day. Most of the time, it was through conversing with uber drivers! Since they are forced to sit in a car with us and listen, we preached the gospel often (we used uber rides to get around daily). I have grown so much as an evangelist and have experienced what it’s like to talk to “free thinkers,” devout religious people, culturally religious people, and even atheists! Although we did not experience instant conversions on the spot, many people accepted invitations to come to church, gave us their WhatsApp, and asked genuine questions. Thank God that we only have to plant seeds and wait for Him to water. We are just laborers. :)

Another notable aspect of our ministry here was the nocturnal attitude of Malaysia. People tend to stay out late at night enjoying fellowship. It was not a rare occasion for us to get back home from McDonald’s at 4 AM on a weekday. In this way, Malaysia was constantly spontaneous. God threw endless opportunities at us to seize and use to bless others. He was always, and is always, inviting us into ways to share the love of Christ and to know Him deeper.

This was especially evident during our time teaching. Many of us were initially discouraged about this ministry because we were instructed to not explicitly share the gospel. The reason for this was to keep the school running so we could minister to the students more long term. Open evangelism would get the school shut down quickly because it is illegal in Malaysia to convert from Islam to Christianity. For clarity, the school is officially Muslim, but our pastor Thomas from Bethel Assembly provides teachers and transportation (kind of a sneaky little mission). I think this challenge presented a unique opportunity to share the gospel in action. Although I often don’t think that my actions reflect Christ, testimony from our head teacher proves that the Holy Spirit is always working. Our friend/leader Jess told us that the students were asking why the people who follow the cross treat them with so much love. The Rohingya people are very looked down upon in Malaysia. They are refugees who fled from genocide in Burma, and they are outcasted, exploited, and overlooked. Most would hardly talk to a Rohingya, let alone touch them, play with them, and smile at them. We had the chance to be the Father’s love in the flesh. Unknowingly, we showed them Jesus’ heart for “the least of these” in Matthew 25. Please continue to pray for these students. Once students receive their high school diplomas (or the equivalent here), the vision is to send them to Singapore for further education and the ability to receive the full gospel from other faithful laborers. Most importantly, pray for revival in the country of Malaysia. We want to see new life!

Clarity

Prepare for a rant!

Throughout the entire Race, I have been wrestling with my future and what the Lord has laid out for me. Often, I have been able to compartmentalize it and focus on the present. However, deep down, my spirit was unsettled in what I wanted to do, with the main topic being whether or not I return to the US Naval Academy. After months of praying for clarity, I felt that I had received no answer. I just wanted God to tell me what to do. Is that not simple enough?! Thankfully, the Lord’s wisdom far exceeds mine, or else we would all be in great trouble. God was not going to just tell me what to do, and I finally realized why. I had not been focusing on the right thing. Every time I imagined the prospect of choosing one route or another, I pictured what I had to contribute/receive. I imagined the work I would have to do, the challenges I would have to face, the fun I would have, the joy I would have, the rewarding aspects of each route, all of it. I kept weighing the pros and cons for my decisions based around my own actions. All the while, the Lord had been beckoning me into dependence. From the foundations of the world, He has promised that He would be with me through anything, and that He would supply the strength in time of need. Obvious, right? I know it sounds simple, but it’s more of an experiential lesson than an intellectual assent that I was missing. On the particular choice of going back to the Naval Academy, I had this dread about all of the annoying things I would have to do, all the freedoms I had to give up, and all of the challenges and cons that come with being a midshipman. Every doubt rose to the surface.

In going back, I envisioned myself persevering through those things on my own strength. I hadn’t been asking the Lord, “will you be with me in this?” It’s not that I did not want a challenge, but rather that I feared choosing the wrong challenge because of selfish reasons—because of gaps I had not asked the Lord to fill. I’m not sure I’m explaining it well, but it does not really matter in the end, because all of my expectations were self-focused. For some reason, I thought God would invade my life if I chose a more free path, but in reality it was all for the sake of self. Yes, I thought that God would not be as free to work in me when I gave up some of my own freedoms. Ridiculous! I had this big realization when I went to the Prayer Mountain here in Guatemala. We spent an hour in the woods alone and I sought the Lord. I did not ask about my future, I just asked what He wanted to show me that day. I saw eagles flying in the air, and immediately I opened my Bible to Isaiah 40:31. I decided, however, to read the whole chapter, and God’s holy hammer got me good. Let’s start at verse 25:

“To whom then will you compare me,

    that I should be like him? says the Holy One.

Lift up your eyes on high and see:

    who created these?

He who brings out their host by number,

    calling them all by name;

by the greatness of his might

    and because he is strong in power,

    not one is missing.

Why do you say, O Jacob,

    and speak, O Israel,

‘My way is hidden from the Lord,

    and my right is disregarded by my God?’

Have you not known? Have you not heard?

The Lord is the everlasting God,

    the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He does not faint or grow weary;

    his understanding is unsearchable.

He gives power to the faint,

    and to him who has no might he increases strength.

Even youths shall faint and be weary,

    and young men shall fall exhausted;

but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;

    they shall mount up with wings like eagles;

they shall run and not be weary;

    they shall walk and not faint.”

Scripture speaks for itself, but in short, God’s got me. He has not disregarded my way. His plan cannot be limited, contained, or thwarted according to his incomprehensible nature. He will provide strength in time of need. He alone is the source and my Mover. That’s clarity. Funny enough, all of this clarity came after I finally made the decision to go back! I just chose in faith and God gave me the answer, the peace, and, of course, the lesson afterwards. God is funny.

Spirit

In recent weeks, I’ve spent time reading Watchman Nee’s The Spiritual Man. This book has changed a lot of my convictions on what walking in the spirit actually looks like. In many ways, God used the author to highlight ways in my own life that I appeared to be walking in the spirit, but I was actually walking in the flesh via my own soul. This is better illustrated in how Nee defines the soul and the spirit. The three parts of the soul are mind, will, and emotion. The three parts of the spirit are intuition, conscience, and communion with God. So often, Christians think that they are having spiritual experiences when they are really just overwhelmed with emotion, trusting in the strength of their own will, or grasping concepts in their mind. Yes, I was doing all three of those, and I did not even know it! I was reading this book, thinking high and mighty about how so many “Christians” are walking in the flesh and then bang! That’s me! 

I’m learning more about how to distinguish the things that are actually heavenly—the real spiritual things. I know this book is not Scripture, but it is certainly backed by it. 

Hebrews 4:11-13:

“Let us therefore strive to enter that rest, so that no one may fall by the same sort of disobedience. 12 For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. 13 And no creature is hidden from his sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account.”

Please pray that as I offer myself as a living sacrifice to Jesus my High Priest, that He would use the blade of Scripture to divide my soul and my spirit, and that through His spirit he would redeem the faculties of my soul to bring glory to Him alone.

This quote from Nee explains it better: “Hence all who desire to experience the parting of soul and spirit must answer the Lord’s call to Calvary and lay themselves unreservedly on the altar, trusting their High Priest to operate with His keen Sword to the dividing asunder of their spirit and soul. For us to lie on the altar is our free-will offering well-pleasing to God; to use the sword to divide is the work of the priest. We should fulfill our part with all faithfulness, and commit the rest to our merciful and faithful High Priest. And at the appropriate time He shall lead us into a complete spiritual experience” (The Spiritual Man, Vol. 1, 198).

PICTURES!

I'm now uploading a bunch of my pictures and videos from the Race onto a cloud album app called PhotoCircle. Use the link to join my album and see what I'm up to!

https://join.photocircleapp.com/ADJ94A8Y36